I know what it's like having a child wake up in the middle of the night soaked wet from a high fever. It's scary when you cannot lessen their pain in a matter of seconds.
Hopelessness is a feeling that I grew to feel on a daily basis. My stepson Joshua left this plane after four long years of having A.L.L. (Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia, or Lmphoblastic Leukemia). He was fourteen and handsome.... he looked just like his Daddy.
I want every parent to know that if you feel uneasy before you walk out of your child’s Doctors office, stop, close the door and tell him your instincts.
Most of the time we go to the Doctor for minor colds and that is also true for children. It is always," just a virus" and,"it will have to run its course.".... Kind of thing.
Because of Joshua I make sure that I ask the Doctor 80% of the time to check their blood. I have two kids now and I make sure that the diagnosis is correct, or at least try my best to.
Doctors can sometimes diagnose that something is definitely not right, weeks maybe months before, with knowledge of blood counts. I know this to be true with Leukemia. The final diagnosis is made with a spinal tap and bone marrow tests. Know too that you should never rely on instincts to diagnose. After all, your Pediatrician has years of medical school whereas instincts don't.
I can tell you our regret with regards to Josh's late diagnosis. I am certain that he had it for a month before he was correctly diagnosed. Unfortunately, his blood was not taken till he got to the emergency room. He had been to the Doctor on numerous occasions. I always sensed something wasn't right.
I urge all parents to be aware of signs of bruising that doesn't go away in a week, nose bleeds, headaches, fever, and pain in the groin area. If these signs are present then make sure and ask the doctor for a complete blood count. Ask for a copy of the blood work or know that they are available to you. If you are not sure what diseases you can spot early, learn about the cells in our blood. It is a rare side of life you normally don't see or even think of. While learning about the blood you can get an idea of how a disease can come into existence. The first book I read on the subject was when Josh was first diagnosed given to us by the Hospital Administration. It is called," You and Leukemia. A Day at a Time" and the authors name is Dr. Lynn S. Baker. The book was written in 1980 but explains some of the blood cells and their function on a level that anyone can understand. It was intended for children 8 and up. Please don't get discouraged if you can't remember the name of the book. When you become committed to help save your child’s life there are other good books as well that are up to date.
After almost four years since we laid him to rest do I now feel like I can be "happy". I am writing a book these days.
The Sun rose not too long ago and I realized that the grass is green and the flowers are beautiful. One day at a time and sometimes one minute at a time. I continue to tell myself that there is a greater knowledge than mine, and I know that one day I will see Josh again. The events following Josh's death lead me to believe in a Higher Power.
Although Josh's passing and his unearthly presence is heartbreaking, I remind myself that each day has its new beginnings.
Parents, make sure you know the signs and symptoms of most of the leading diseases in childhood. And don't forget to have your child’s blood taken if you are uncertain or feel uneasy. Your instinct might save your child’s life!
Jennifer Jennings
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